Did she really use...?

Sometimes I forget about the gross factor of my medium in this series of sculpture. People have approached my ‘Strip” sculpture, creeping in to get a closer look – then recoiling when realizing that there’s blood in the work. Yes, the strips have my blood on them. I seal the strips up with varnishes and sealants. I take precautions to avoid flaking off of the dried blood before the strips are sealed. Until they are sealed I never let anyone other than me handle them, and I have so far only worked with my own strips. Once sealed, I can drill and chain-maille the strips safely.

I think it’s a strange enough medium to address, though. Why would anybody create art with this stuff? For those unfamiliar with the testing process in people with diabetes, please allow an explanation:

I use a meter to tell me where my blood sugar levels are. The meter takes a drop of blood on a strip. There’s a light sensor in the meter that reads the concentration of sugar in my blood, and gives me a number. If the number is too high, I have to change something in my diet and exercise to get it down. If the number is too low, I eat or drink something sugary to quickly get it back up. Too much sugar shreds the cardiovascular system over time, among other things. Too low of a sugar drop could be an emergency. When the test is done and I have my number, I have a used strip with my blood on it. The blood dries and is embedded into the fabric in the strip. It’s a snapshot. Over time, and when I test frequently, the strips add up.

In a sculpture class for my undergrad one project I was assigned was to “make something beautiful out of something ugly.” I had a few hundred of these used strips that I didn’t know how to dispose of. They were fascinating to me because they told a story of my status as a patient at that moment in time. A snapshot. An ugly snapshot. I didn’t want to test. I hated the process, and I hated having endocrine issues. In using these to create something beautiful, the process was cathartic and helped to change my own attitude about living with diabetes. The process of regular testing allowed me to stay out of a hospital when I didn't have health insurance. It also helped me to get pregnant and carry my healthy son to full term = something I was told would never happen because of my PCOS. This restraint actually turned in to a support. I made something beautiful out of something ugly.